NIMBY

Or in this case “NIMFY” (Not in my front yard) or “NOMS” (Not on my street)! 

I got home from choir practice tonight to find Dan’s car parked out in front of my house with him and five of his “old” friends sitting in it.  I recognized those faces.  And the scene seriously triggered panic in my soul.  I texted him “I thought you weren’t going to hang out with those people anymore and WHY ARE YOU SITTING IN FRONT OF MY HOUSE?”  Anyway, he went back to his dad’s and called me (at my request) to talk about it.

I said, “You might not remember much about the last six months but I remember everything.  I love you and I want you to be well.  If you are going to break your own rule and associate with those people, do not do it in front of my house please.”  He apologized.  Said he is fine.  My stomach is nauseous and I’m still awake at 11:45PM.  So easily disturbed, I am.

(I wish I was the ocean.)

7 responses to “NIMBY

  1. What you see is the truth. What you’re told is not. These so-called friends don’t dare pull into my driveway. They know the reaction will be swift and high drama will ensue. Unfortunately, we can only protect our own space and then pray that those we love do the same. Take care of yourself. You are not alone.

  2. So sorry. I hope he is being honest but old friends lead to old behaviors. Sleep is overrated these days. I was up all night too. My daughter never called last night. Havent spoken to her since Saturday at rehab. Hope that means she is doing well.but since this is my first go round dont know. Will continue to pray for your son and you to have the strength to get through this.

  3. One of the hardest things we endure is watching the truth and listening to the lies (and sometimes they don’t even know they are telling lies…it is the drug talking). You must take care of yourself. It is imperative, as your health is part of your strength. You didn’t cause it, you can’t control it; and you can’t cure it. You are in my prayers. Renee, you are too.

  4. Thank you, ladies. Always good to know we are not alone. Dan is being closely monitored by the courts. So he will not be able to go too deep for too long before being caught, which will mean back to jail. So in that I take my rest. There is another system keeping an eye on him. It’s not my job anymore. I think that’s a good thing, depending on the day.

  5. I can so relate to this post. My son is on probation but is actively using. Not sure how he gets away with it as they drug test him randomly and he has to attend drug classes two times a week. I agree with Madison, what you see is true, what you hear is not. Took me a long time to realize that because it is a hard pill to swallow, not believing anything your own child tells you, even if it may be the truth. You are right, it is not your job anymore, even if probation is out of the picture. God Bless.

  6. I know what you mean about having the courts keep an eye on him. I am so grateful for that in my son’s life too. He’s not even home yet but he knows: NO OLD FRIENDS. Which means no friends at all 😦 He’ll have to make new ones.

    Hope you sleep better tonight.

  7. Lisa, Thanks for the prayers. My daughter put herself in rehab and this is the first time so when she comes home no one will be watching her but us and her meetings and drug testing. I hope all she says is truth but I understand lying is part of who she was. I told her no old friends also, Barbara and she will have to make new friends also. Unfortunately, her boyfriend was using with her and he is in another facility. We have not crossed what will happen with that when they both come home but she understands they cannot be together right now. Once she comes home I dont know how that will play out. I wish I could have a mirror to look into the future but right now day by day is all we can do.

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