So Many Needs, So Little Time

I’m thinking Garbo.  Just wanna be alone.  Not the first to say it, not the last.  I’m in the mood to be a drama queen.  “Hey folks, over here!  Look at me!”  How about a little help over in this direction?

I almost cracked on Friday night.  It was like this:  My ex-husband called me and asked me to come over to his house to talk about Dan.  Dan (my addict boy) has been living full-time with his dad.  So i said sure and went over.  On the way there, my middle boy, Al, called.  His car was stuck on a highway in the snow storm during rush hour.  He was 30 miles from the house.  Could I come and pick him up?  No.  Then a few minutes into the chat with the ex, Dan called.  He was with a friend driving to pick up the friend’s mom and their car slid on the ice and hit another car.  Could I come and pick them up?  No.  Then my boyfriend texted, “Get dressed honey, I’m on my way and let’s get some italian and a glass of wine!  Yay!”  Then there was my ex in front of me, “So I need some advice, I just don’t know what to do with him anymore…”  And in the midst of all of THAT, my daughter (15) texts and asks when I will be home because I promised to make her a grilled cheese sandwich and she’s hungry.  MAKE IT YOURSELF!!! 

I just want to be alone. 

Now it’s Sunday  morning and I’m feeling better.  But Friday night…I hit overload.  And you know what?  My daughter got herself something to eat.  Al got his car off the highway, and someone stopped and helped him get going again.  Dan told his friend he’d have to handle things on his own and walked home to talk with me and his dad.  My boyfriend didn’t wait for me and went home.  And my ex cooked a dinner so that I would have something to eat.  Sometimes saying no is the best thing.

I still haven’t had any time alone.  And I still want it.  I still sometimes want to throw a little fit so someone will stop and take care of me for a change.  But that’s okay.  This is a long, hard road sometimes, and I don’t have to be perfect.  How about you?

3 responses to “So Many Needs, So Little Time

  1. I understand the feelings of “When it is it my turn?” “When might someone take care of me?” I guess the fact that we recognize that we need this is part of our success in learning to say “no,” and not taking care of everything for everyone else.

    I am stoked (yes a word out of my past!) that you were able to say “no” on Friday night, even if it felt like overload because they were asking. You controlled the situation. Great Job!!!

  2. Makes me think of the old commercial, “Calgon, take me away!”
    I totally know how you feel, there have been times when I ask, “When is it going to be MY time???”
    Slowly through Al-Anon I am working on my time being now. You had 3 kids and 2 men vying for your attention Friday night, but you did manage to say NO. You took care of first things first.
    The trick will be, when the opportunity comes for time alone, to realize it is there and take it! Through Al-Anon I’ve realized I have CHOICES. Friday night seems like the perfect storm, fortunately not all nights are like that. And you made it through, and you said NO… admittedly way better than I could have done!
    I’m glad you’re feeling better today and I hope the opportunity for time alone comes your way soon and you take it. Praise God that not all days are like last Friday. The opportunity will come.
    God bless.

  3. OH yeah! I can relate and I only have ONE KID and no ex husband and no boyfriend! I do have a lot of people “needing me” a lot though and definitely want to scream “ITS MY TURN TO BE TAKEN CARE OF” sometimes but there is no one to hear me so I just keep it to myself 🙂

    Thank you for great reminder on that powerful two-letter word “no”. I hope that you get some alone time soon.

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