Rest for the Weary

I haven’t been sleeping well this week.  There is so much on my  mind and heart.  You all know how it is.  I’ve got a bundle right now.  Perhaps listing them here will help me rest:

  1. My daughter and I are definitely moving from the midwest to the east coast — in about two months.  LOTS to think about there.
  2. I need to get money from my ex before we go (an amount he owes me as part of the divorce agreement).  And then I need to tell him I”m moving his daughter just a little far away…
  3. I haven’t seen Dan since he went to jail a week ago (or was it two weeks?  yep, two weeks I think).  The police automatically put a restraining order in place, which says we are not allowed to communicate.  I’m going to try sending a letter to him anyway, just so he knows I care.
  4. Found out tonight that Dan’s dad (my ex) is considering bailing him out!  THIS is what has me awake tonight.  He asked my opinion, and, um, I said NO.  I know he (my ex) wants to believe that dan will stay in rehab this time.  I cannot agree.
  5. My boyfriend and I are sad that we will be very far apart, and unsure of what to do about our relationship when I move.
  6. Oh…That’s all for now.

BUT, there is light at the end of the tunnel, which you also know (or you will know someday).  And for me, it’s that even if physical rest escapes me right now, I have spiritual rest and relief.  When I cannot do for myself; God does for me.  When I cannot find my own rest, I receive the peace that passes all understanding in the deepest part of my soul.  When I cannot pray, the Holy Spirit cries out for me.  And when I just have nothing more to give, God holds me gently until I can walk again.

I wish you all a blessed weekend.  May you know the light of God’s love wherever you walk.

Your friend and journey companion,
Kay

12 responses to “Rest for the Weary

  1. Writing down you concerns and wories is a good way to sort them all out. I hope you will find peace and clarity. Are you moving for a new job? Leaving kids in jail and boyfriend behind must be tough. I’ll pray you find peace and sleep.

    • onemomtalking

      I am moving to take my daughter away from this craziness so she can have a chance at a normal life. I kept putting it off because I thought my presence here would help my son. But it’s hurting her more than it’s helping him. So I’m taking her to where we have family support and a new start. It’s a good thing really. Tough, but good.

  2. Kay,
    I admire you for making this move for your daughter, you have done all you can to help Dan and like you said – it hasn’t helped him. Maybe somehow this will speak to him? I hope so. I hope you are able to work out the relationship with the boyfriend. Good men are hard to find these days (at least where I live).

    Hope you get some physical rest this weekend.

  3. Maybe you can convince the boyfriend to come along. Barbara is right, good men are hard to find. It took me seven years to find mine after my divorce. Good luck to you. Sounds like you thought out your plan well. Love the ones you are with is my motto these days.

  4. I hope that moving will be as much for you as it is for your daughter. You deserve the additional family support. And your love for Dan won’t change, whether you are 5 miles away or 5,000 miles away. But what may change is that he will realize he has to take responsibility for his life, his addiction and then hopefully his recovery.

    And as far as the boyfriend goes,if he feels strongly about his relationship with you, he will show up at your door. I’m sure of it. You deserve someone that loves you for you, and not for what you do for them.

  5. Kay – – -omg – – – can’t believe how much you have on your plate right now. Perhaps, moving will mean a new beginning, on your own terms. A time to reinvent yourself and your life, and a chance to remove yourself from the stresses and entanglement of your son’s disease. Good luck. I will follow you wherever you go. Peggy

  6. I wish you the best in all the changes. I recently moved to Minnesota from Texas and left all three of my young adult children behind, including my addict who is 20. It’s good to be far away in some ways, but not in others. Keep us posted and your attitude is great. That’s a lot to deal with.

    • onemomtalking

      Hi. You posted this comment awhile ago, but I just now really paid attention. Thanks for letting me know I’m not the only one making this decision to move. I hope you are doing well. I have five weeks until I get in the car and drive East. It’s exciting and scary. But God watches over all of us, and He is strongest when we are weak. So I’m thinking we’re gonna see miracles! Blessings to you.

  7. Praying for you, Kay!

    Cheri

  8. They say that moving is among the 5 most stressful things people go through. Also in the list are things like loosing a spouse, so allow yourself to feel nervous because evidently it is normal. The fact that you can keep things in perspective is really to your credit. Keep the faith, it seems to be working for you. Letting a loved one stay in jail to keep them sober just reminds us all how powerful addiction is. Hopefully he will have hit his bottom and be willing to seek treatment when he gets out.

  9. Hi Kay, I am a new blogger and just found your post from someone else’s blog. Please come visit my blog MotherofaBeautifulAddictBoy and you’ll discover we have a common heartache but also a common faith. It is good to find other Christians in this community.

  10. Best of luck and I hope all goes well. Keep us posted.
    Carolyn

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