Maybe this is it. Dan came over last night. He looked good. i didn’t see any marks on his arms. (I know you can smoke heroin but I also know that his preferred method of use is the needle). I gave him his Christmas gifts.
It was an awkward visit. We’re both trying not to have his addiction be the center of every conversation. And yet, until he gets his life going, there’s not much else to say. So we talked about his recovery: he is wondering what to do with himself since he cannot go back to his old circle of friends; he will start job searching; he is still journaling about his experience; he hopes to get an apartment in a few months — ready to move forward away from his parents at this point.
Positive: I told him I was trying to get through to a program where they’d give him suboxone (a drug that settles the cravings). He asked me to give him the number, and said he would make the calls. That’s a big step in my mind — that he is ready to take the responsibility for his own recovery to that extent. Heck. He’ll be 20 in a couple of months. Mama is learning to let go.