Sometimes the line between these two is very vague. And sometimes it’s just me and my denial sitting down for afternoon tea. I don’t know – so I’m asking your opinion. Here’s the scenario:
Back in October, before Al’s first rehab stint, he shoplifted a $50 item from a store. He got caught. He went to court. He was sentenced to one 8-hour class and told if he stays out of trouble for a year the charge would go away. Also, the store sent him a fine for $250. The class is in a week and the fine is coming due soon. But, Al is in rehab in another state, and he cannot make long-distance calls for more than a few minutes. (He can receive them, but not make them).
I want to (a) call the court and defer the class until after his rehab is over and (b) contact the store’s legal department and defer the paying of the fine until he can get out and talk to them himself and perhaps set up a payment plan. I would make these initial calls for him. I’m not trying to get him out of these things, but I want him to have a full rehab experience without having to leave rehab for three days to go back to colorado, take the class, and be driven back to Kansas. Plus I don’t want him to be back in the old neighborhood any sooner than necessary. That was part of the point of sending him so far away.
His dad says I’m enabling if I make these calls for him. He says the addict has to handle all consequences himself … and if he gets in more trouble because he can’t make the appropriate calls from where he is, so be it.
We have about a week to decide our strategy. So — opinions? I’m polling the crowd!. (have a blessed day!)