Someone recently mentioned “The Four G’s” in relation to dealing with the addict or alcoholic in your life. They are easier said than done, of course, but I liked the general idea:
- Get off their back
- Get out of their way
- Give ’em to God
- Go to a meeting
Of course, for #4 you can put whatever you do that helps you help yourself. I think it’s a good reminder. I like the idea that if we try to do everything for the addict in our lives…and if we help them avoid the natural consequences of their behaviors, we rob them of their autonomy and self-respect because we are not allowing them to learn from their own mistakes – which is what leads to recovery. Our well-meaning efforts sometimes actually get in the way. We think we’re helping, for instance, by not putting our 19 y.o. out on the streets in the snow … but maybe that’s the precise thing needed to wake up their inner spirit to the idea that they need to change their choices. I don’t know if I articulated that well enough, but maybe you get the idea.
Whew. Life’s a wild ride, ain’t it? Thanks for walking the tough roads together. It really helps to have companions!