Someone recently mentioned “The Four G’s” in relation to dealing with the addict or alcoholic in your life. They are easier said than done, of course, but I liked the general idea:
- Get off their back
- Get out of their way
- Give ’em to God
- Go to a meeting
Of course, for #4 you can put whatever you do that helps you help yourself. I think it’s a good reminder. I like the idea that if we try to do everything for the addict in our lives…and if we help them avoid the natural consequences of their behaviors, we rob them of their autonomy and self-respect because we are not allowing them to learn from their own mistakes – which is what leads to recovery. Our well-meaning efforts sometimes actually get in the way. We think we’re helping, for instance, by not putting our 19 y.o. out on the streets in the snow … but maybe that’s the precise thing needed to wake up their inner spirit to the idea that they need to change their choices. I don’t know if I articulated that well enough, but maybe you get the idea.
Whew. Life’s a wild ride, ain’t it? Thanks for walking the tough roads together. It really helps to have companions!
Thank you for sharing that. It helped me a lot today.
I am glad to be with you on this ride. Never would have made it this far alone.
I was home from work today as a result of bad weather and wanted to let you know I found your blog and am reading all your postings from the beginning. I’m now into March, 2010. I am so glad I found you and have added you to my favorites list. I appreciate all of you who share your lives so honestly for the benefit of the rest of us who are strggling right along with you. I’m looking forward to the rest of your postings. Many things have touched me deeply today. I am grateful.
Lisa
Hello Lisa, Thank you for writing and reading and for subscribing to my blog! It sounds like you are one of us. Please feel free to email me if you want to chat one-on-one. You can use this email: onemomtalking@gmail.com. God bless you. I hope you have a good support network where you are.
You articulated this perfectly. I am trying to let go again. Worry is literally making my chest hurt.
I know the feeling. So sorry for your hurt. We are living a continual process. Only one thing is required of you: Breath in. Breath out.